Friday 28 July 2006

Sex Is the Mightiest Lever for Public Outrage in America

I am known as the scourge of my fellow-countrymen, but I am always glad to find something nice about Germany to comment on. No lie!

This time it's about G. "Dubyah" Bush's assault on German Chancellor Angela Merkel's female integrity and delicacy, dubbed "Massage Gate" by the American media.

What did Bush do to justify such a comparison? Did he abuse his power toward the goal of undermining his political opposition's position and efforts? Commit or condone burglary? Wiretapping? Lying to the public? Or, on a slightly different note, did he have sleazy sex with an intern in the Oval Office?

None of the above.

SPIEGEL ONLINE informs us that at last week's G-8 summit in St. Petersburg, Bush stepped behind Angela Merkel, reached for her shoulders, gave her a quickie squeeze. Startled, Merkel threw up her arms, Bush walked away.

Within hours, links to photographs and video footage of the neck grab could be found all over the Internet, propelled by the typical obsessive American verve only frustrated sexuality is able to evoke.
"You could use this video for sexual harassment training," Democratic Party activist Martha Whetsone told the San Francisco Chronicle newspaper. "It's something you'd show and say: 'No one in a boss' position should be doing that.'"
That is the same Martha Whetsone, mind you, who was on one of Clinton and Gore's infamous White House Coffee Guest Lists, namely on October 5, 1995. AFTER the grotty Paula Jones-affair became public knowledge, that was. Ms. Whetsone seems to have a rather selective sense for outrage.
"Our president, the drive-by-harasser," wrote outraged blogger Lindsay Beyerstein. "Like any practiced groper, Bush stares right past Merkel as she recoils from his touch," Beyerstein wrote in her blog. She also complained that by walking on after Merkel raised her arms, he was acting is if the episode had been "her problem."
What "problem", Lindsay? Did I miss something? Maybe he made her pregnant and left her in the lurch?

Bush's antics have also angered women's rights activists and political analysts outside the blogosphere as well.
"He behaves like a frat boy," said Olga Vives, vice president of the National Organization for Women (NOW). [You know NOW? That refuge only the most beautiful, sweet and talented women are seeking to escape personal responsibility for being massively repulsive? "Oh no, you're not a fat pig, you're victimized by the Patriarchal Beauty Myth! You're not an ugly, unloved, celibate loser, you're surrounded by Commitment-Phobic Sexually Confused Males! And no, you're not repellant, socially inept, and utterly annoying, you're merely facing the backlash against assertive, empowered womyn!"] "This is definitely crossing the line." Vives said she believes that Bush would never have treated a male colleague in the same way. "Was he flirting with her, not treating her like an equal?" she asked.
Which is clearly one of those questions nobody knew it existed and whose answer nobody but a couple of only too-powerful men-hating, sexually frustrated American hags and their doormats in the media want to know.

Oddly, or, if one wants to see it that way, not too surprisingly, Germans have been largely indifferent to it. "Bush: Love-Attack on Merkel!" the German tabloid Bild screeched without much echo in the serious media.

This is odd because Germany is usually the leading voice within the international "We hate Bush" cacophony. It is, on the other hand, not too surprising because Germans have a refreshingly down-to-earth attitude when it comes to sex.

Merkel herself can't be bothered. A government spokeswoman contacted by SPIEGEL ONLINE said that the chancellor did not want to comment on the issue, and that the debate was obviously an American, not a German one.

Bravo Angie! And a very astute observation.

My take on that? I find "Dubyah" massively obnoxious and I don't even WANT to know how he was as a little boy, but at least he isn't one of those pussywhipped, emasculated, sex-starved American excuses for a man who are so brainwashed that they don't even notice how much they have internalised what is rammed down their throats by a deeply misandrist society. What is that? It is the axiom that the orifice between a woman's legs turns her into to a boundlessly precious higher being that must be put on a piedestal, must be paid for in 18 carat gold (and a diamond to match, ever had a glimpse at that obscene American wedding cult?) and never be answered back to.

Do Americans never exchange pranks when young? Dubyah's gaffe reminds me of the mischievous adolescent boys who used to flip our equally adolescent bra-elastics (and which made us throwing our arms up in surprise) way back, which was either an overture to some adolescent gitchi gitchi or got them a punch on the nose and that was that. But I guess Americans, those people who drag little boys accused of some sexual misconduct in handcuffs and shackles to prison because they think that male sexuality is dangerous and abusive per se (apart from the sexuality of Democratic presidents, that is...), even in the person of a just-not-a-toddler-anymore, don't have gitchi gitchi, adolescent or not. They have law suits for sexual harassment instead. But that's alright. Sex IS disgusting. It spoils one's makeup and "coiffure", may leave stains and sexual harassment lawsuits are more lucrative anyway.

Incidentally, did anybody notice that Merkel, after she twigged about the prank, actually SMILED? Not very broadly, she is Angela Merkel, not Julia Roberts, after all, but smile she did.

And why, by the way, did hardly anybody complain when that oaf Dubyah turned the lawn of Buckingham Palace into a newly ploughed field with his helicopters and entourage? ("The Palace's head gardener, Mark Lane, was reported to be in tears when he saw the scale of the damage.")

"Now ARE you gaga or aren't you?" The Queen asks the question to end all questions.

Wouldn't that have made a splendid "Our president, the fly-by-hooligan" headline?

No?

Why is that?

That is because all those utterly annoying, men-hating, sexually frustrated American hags and their doormats in the media assertive, empowered womyn give an aviating fornication for a few traumatised flamingoes, flattened rare plants and a chuffed old woman. Sex is the mightiest lever for public outrage in America.

It's about power, stupid!